Saturday, December 31, 2011

evacuation to Ahissior

The tent city at Ahissior mostly contained Sahallangke refugees from Parabst and Meromuffin, worlds that had since been evaporated by the unexpected induced supernova of their lightcandle, Shoregears, due to the uncontrolled sun-dive of an exotic matter freighter.

It is worth noting that the Sahallangke would have survived the supernova with no loss of life -- they use a variation of the quantum foam bodies that the Vlyssanghai used, not as sophisticated as the Pund mind you, but still better than raw biological bodies. But, the induced supernova would have completely destroyed the ecosystems of Parabst and Meromuffin, and nobody really wants to live in a lifeless place (although there are some entities whose personalities seem to thrive on sterility)

The dispatch of emergency precise targeted tonnage engines to Parabst and Meromuffin was organized by a few Pund engineers who were experienced with that sort of thing. PTTEs are known to little finicky, and it takes a lot of work to get a million of them to land at-will in a lattice on some remote body with large thronteareal separation between the launch point and the destination. Aruguheksne Caltombinim Axilliorwelwei, the "Ad Hoc PTTE General Engineer" of the Shoregears Reclamation Project (that's what they called themselves), has this to say about landing lattices of PTTEs:

ACA: "The real difficulty here is not remotely landing a tonnage engine. We've known how to do that for the last ten billion years or so, and to do so reliably and precisely. The problem is that of auto-diffraction. Tonnage engines without sentient occupants are known to autodiffract, and large numbers of tonnage engines moving together increases the probability of autodiffraction by several orders of magnitude. We have solved this problem by aggressively breeding and genetic engineering many variants of the palahyla, scurugussit, and gahearalloge lichen species, and applying a diversity of variants
to every surface of the tonnage engine's interior that could possibly support them. We've had one or two autodiffractions -- as opposed to the many that would be the case in a target population of 100,000 PTTEs, which demonstrates the success of our methods"

Galthasseroy Gruss-Povilchrotte, the ad-hoc Sahallangke 'leader' has this to say about the evacuation:

"Sure, we weren't pleased about leaving our homes, and we're not as, uh, ridiculous as the Pund would be about it, but we've only been using these bodies for a pretty short time and we're still smoothing out the internal relationships between post-Sagahanta and post-Vlyssanghai. I've talked with Aruguheksne about this: he says that they just would have stood and watched the induced supernova destroy the ecosystem of the world, because, they say "someone's got to observe everything". I guess I really don't understand the Pund perspective. Sure, we all got out in time, and still have extrusion records on our home architectures, so we'll be able to regrow everything in a matter of minutes when we find a suitable environment. Aruguheksne recommends the Sussulfunister Highlands, which is a recent volcanism geographical region of Sormeus, two throntears from here. I have to admit, though, I don't understand the thronteareal geography or topology, which seems to be a bizarre combination of every geographic feature possible, including higher dimensional ones. For instance, globular clusters, probability shelves, tectonic plates, rivers of water and or neutrinos are all mentioned in the same breath, as if there is a continuous gradation between them all.

I've talked with my compatriots about this, and we're not entirely happy about the  Sussulfunister Highlands, not because it sounds like a horrendous places -- the holoeos of it that Aruguheksne have provided seem to indicate that it's a pleasant, if unforgiving place rich in basalt and feldspar and geothermal energy surfaces -- but that we're having difficulty understanding exactly where Sormeus is in relation to the rest of our cosmology. When I asked Aruguheksne, he said "well, it's one twenty four millionth of a throntear from the Schilliringope Gulfwall, four gigathrontears from Scultum, two throntears from the Gyre of Golfgrease, and about a kilothrasmere from the center of the Puttgown Archipelago galaxy in the Constellation of Juruljinoa, The Pthactylismer.", but we were unclear if this was a planetary surface, or some other kind of surface. Aruguheksne seemed to indicate that Sormeus had been around a long time (three billion years!), so wasn't going anywere anytime soon. Puttgown is not anticipated to be involved in any galactic collisions for at least another five hundred million years."

Salhylahemangbe Gohosconse Ailahekorhiyun, one of the more notorious commentators of late on the Barreptro Fingum Mhotobierredge Analysis Conglomerate has this to say about the whole affair:

"Everyone has praised the rapidity of the response of the rescue team, but there have been few questions raised about the Pfthertegue exotic matter freighter. The Pfthertegue are notorious for being body-nativists and they've got a well developed postrelativistic economy spanning the Haltermanive Arm. They aren't a monoculture, but they're taking their sweet time diversifying, probably due to badly engineered large scale communication networks on their homeworld. The dominant belief system of the Pfthertegue endorses both body nativism and biological quadritaxy, so the recent Sahallangke colonizations in this part of spacetime are not likely to generate a favorable reaction in the minds of the energy resource arbitrators of the Pfthertegue. It is possible that the freighter was deliberately programmed to crash into Shoregears. There is no legal framework for prosecuting the Pfthertegue, if it can be demonstrated that the responsibility for the crash was theirs. A Pfthertegue dissident group, the Curriers of Morrast, has without evidence, assumed this to be the case, and have been broadcasting apologies in the Shoregears system for the past week or so.

Julnuirinnib Liorilla-po-Gsyerre, the spokesbeing for the Curriers of Morrast has laid blame on the Council of Tasaiu, the governing body of the Pfthertegue, saying that "We regret the actions of our dominant mimetocrats and energy arbitrators. It is obvious to us that the Shoregears debacle was a result of the discontent and bigotry which is rampant in our civilization against postbiological species. We believe that Tylneiriffike Scillgotthe-vu-Nsothe is the most likely entity to have been responsible for the sundive, so, as an act of specietal contrition, we will voluntarily decrypt several flomes of his communication and put it up on local data networks accessible to the Sahallangke refugees" "

Monday, December 19, 2011

living inhabitants of Sculym and the Oddlands

Sculym is twelve throntears arctangential from the Bridge of Inverse Mumbles, and one escarpment over the throbbing Gios Thyrry Anastomosis on the Ayarghu Probability Shelf. Sculym and the Oddlands are a curious zone of nonsentient organisms. The biopherecist L. Azifthreoy Pahaerel wrote this summary for the Vaveuslin Encyclopedium:

Sculym's stratigraphy consists of microkarst with calcine inclusions, along with various tectonic irregularities where Ayarghu is subducting under the Storgossil plate. The deep layers consist of congealed event plumes and other ethereal geographies, including chance-inclusions and coincidence tektites which have densities in between the ethereal and the material and thus tend to float to the Ahovovicic discontinuity, the separation between the ethereal and the material. Folding and extrusion are common, as the ethereal geography places extreme stresses on the material stratigraphy: things forced from one side to the other generally have chemically implausible structures: Helium dioxide crystals, neon germanate, argon trisulfide, as well as complex hyperbolic fluorinated boron heterostructures.

The yasdroghy (Hylofiesma arbuthnotensis) is probably the most abundant microfauna and tends to colonize coincidence-tektites that are far displaced on the material side of Sculym. Pahaerel says that genetic testing of the yasdroghy reveals that a single stranded RNA virus from the Bolrerino tree (LK120, strain f, substrains 30a,b,q)  made it this far outweird from the Sculkexor Peninsula on Baxon.
Also abundant are moerlids (Ujurulia stalcontii, Ujurulia halverfordium, Ujurulia palhapsina), which occupy the upper ethereal and sporulate on the down quark of the neutron of deuterium atoms in the plenum D2O of the symboplasts of the ethereal/material spanning Bithelvaria trees (Alocqpuod salvinestorii). the D2O is absorbed in above ground (material) root systems of the Bithelvaria trees which are diffuse assemblages of gnarled woven buckyfiber and then transported down through the interface into the Bithelvaria tree's ethereal anatomy. There the moerlid spores hatch into juvenile moerlids, evanescent filter feeders more than a kilothrontear in diameter which feed on the neutrino refringences of implausible events and live for many a conquil. (spongylls and moerlids are an example of convergent evolution, and Pahaerel says that spongylls usually get better publicity). Old moerlids -- ones that are in the final, reproductive phase of life migrate above the border and intentionally snag themselves on Bithelvaria root systems, and then deposit their spores on the aforementioned neutrons.

There are a variety of undistinguished tuspid megafauna in the Oddlands, the varscrique (Belpulungu frisparior) -- a nine legged herbivore which feeds on the hanging moss (Urusquizon tortenkely) which lives on the Bithelvaria trees, the phelmonate and aphelmonate barachtys (respectively: Zorquilo varispardium and Zorquilo allombens) -- tripedal, axisymmetric insectivores, most likely got loose from a tonnage engine at some point when barachtys were popular with the merchant class of Isiktaq and Mulmulktaq. Recognizable by both their transparence and iridity, the barachtys move awkwardly and eat slow moving insects (three legs does not make a stable locomotion strategy make). There are insect species -- the navwol (Helquirasse galifordium), -- think of the navwol as a cockroach-butterfly with bright green wings and equal to the cockroach in terms of being a disease bearer, the sculfrelesk (Agatalor gehenscens) -- which is a six-winged dragonfly with mothlike coloration and opaque wings.

The most exotic organism which lives this far trifurcatory to the Maalwulf divide is probably the whalgrofovea (Acherolaster syllegria) . One of the things naturalists found in the first surveys of Sculym were solid cubes of erbium that didn't seem to tarnish in air. These erbium cubes possessed a strange geological buoyancy: they would all float (slowly, over many months) to float to the surface. They didn't seem to tarnish and the chemists tasks with analyzing them could not find a chemical reason that they were immune from tarnish. The biopherecists then used diffractive quark spectroscopy and demonstrated that the virtual pions on 167Er and 162Er were the ends of long ethereal filamentous processes.

The solid erbium cubes of the whalgrofovea are eggs. Like the moerlids, the whalgrofovea have a bicameral reproductive cycle: the eggs of a whalgrofoveon are layed at the material/ethereal interface and float upwards toward the surface of the Oddlands. When one hatches, the virtual pions are drawn into the ethereal, and most of the mass energy is released: the added effect of this is the pion is turned real and withdrawn from the egg, meaning that any interactions which involved the pion cannot complete appropriately, and the cube is more or less instantly transmuted to holmium. The whalgrofoveon lives in 30THz event sheaves (most of them triombent to the Ayarghu Shelf) and its size is measured in picothrontears and it lives for, on average, 12 and a half million years.

Once hatched, the eggshells become food for pitscarves (Olortheugis mahathekelia) , a high frequency (though not ethereal) organism that lives in the mountains of Sculym and the Oddlands, They overnight in the bases of mountains, and spend the day moving between different mountains at 2/3rds the speed of light. Their feeding mechanism involves the total conversion of holmium (and only holmium atoms) into (nearly) energy, but their main waste product consists of FM radio emissions (which tend to sound like either French or Byrthistu philosophically wanking depending on the season, French in the summer, Byrthistu in the winter)

Sunday, December 18, 2011

uggherio wulzenthorem

Carruthers, General (REPORT):

The new Sinyan 3 porrogoly modules continue to outflob the old Sinyan 2 buggers by gasps as large as a mosquito: if the heptachroid had been mustard-ready, my litotes would be trampled, but I suppose one cannot minister to an inverted squirrel. Oh alabaster speleothems and other disregarded canasta sessions bedecked with liquid tinsel and the congress of the disabused: if Arnathaude and Melgemerave had spent at least eight hours considering the requisitional parameters then we might have made it out of this mudpit in two weeks instead of five, but proper protocols must be adhered to: not for some slavish adoration of the law, but because they are here to protect us from physical situations that are inimical to the process of living: an uncapped gespyon slot has incredible transtructive potential, and one need not have one's body transfigured into a number of grapefruit by transplosion. And even if it was suggested that our druthers were unsorted and out of order, at least we were certifiably unprepared for an encounter with a Droythelegm and a Pnyctoid.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

um, I didn't catch what you just said. Could you repeat that mumbling please?

Pheoboyms of 1/3rd, list:
Abstract: The following individuals have ascended to Da 3, and are no longer required to carry a Fthay:

Cerello T'noyam
Arthulbusmer Kercoggins
Vua Culo
Zaroasler Gal'Huin
Movom Martam

Pheoboyms of 1/2, list:
Abstract: The following individuals have ascended to Da 2, and are no longer required at straking rituals:

Rungile Thelestory
Arapaunec Cosidiorigua
Glufnesspoy Gesterjey
Nua Coropia

Pheoboyms of 1/1, list
Abstracct: The following individuals have ascended to Da 1, and are liberated from the ramshackle:

Gelsentua Dorpisaro
Tlymentheron Aduargru

General notes for this month: We've been having problems with the valve-trumpets, and Goss Vorvensby says that as soon as we get the next consignment of raw materials, she may be able to fashion the right valve grease. Organics are shipping at discounted costs, so when the plaza has the intermaterials  bazaar on the fifth, be sure to pick up any creams, vapors, crystals, gases, and/or any exotiques you may need. Rumor has it that squares will be forbidden to those confined to the ramshackle for the next two weeks. Hxohua Corporation may occupy a Prendergast shortly, so make sure you have all your parameterization forms in. Happy Vnoonking!

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

thralskrake and araspongbyllib

Thralskrake, the Epeyungspid from Eyagot dropped the helical gnoove-knife on the ground, and it shattered. Araspongbyllib, the Pund observer nodded assent. "Has it really been that long?" questioned Thralskrake. Araspongbyllib spoke "It has been roughly fourteen million conques since the Elusqeo conflict. I managed to have myself sealed in a cube of sold iridium for the first eight million conques. For the past six million or so I have been checking out the local phrenomes: there are some suggestive local conceptual hierarchies that indicates that we are on the waxing cycle of mylirstid migration. I didn't know that mylirstids came farther than the Augzayle gulfshelf, but as we are a measure or two from Silosset, and their are abundant mylirstids in torpor, the chances are we have hit on one of the substrata of the Augzayle, which means, that if I understand the stratigraphy of this area correctly, we may be able to find a tunnel plume to Boriogomia, which as it stands is still on the Minor Reticulation."

Thralskrake's eyes lit up: "So there's a chance we can return to Zohore?"
Araspongbyllib continued: "Mind you, we're pretty deep into Augzayle. This far into a gulfshelf and there are undoubtedly going to be Accidents, Reparations, and Defenestrations. My Heptant is a little off, but as long as we ride westerly for a while we might avoid them. We may have to drop a level or two to find a tunnel plume easily. If we are where I think we are, and the map update I just caught is valid -- it authenticates but I don't know if the signature is forged."
Thralskrake asked: "were you able to recover the CGC blade stash?"
Araspongbyllib sunk: "No. That worries me. I think we may need to find that before we even think about traversing to Zohore. There are living things here that are capable of using one of those that have no business, and if the stash's containment is damaged there could be all sorts of nastiness"

Saturday, December 10, 2011

war machines

Colonel Shalgrussiadge and the Ninth Division of the Fusiliers were having a raucous time celebrating their destruction of the two Ghusmoygne-Albrassago Engines-of-Devastation that the Kerveley Republic had been planning to deploy on the Shelflands. The Fusiliers had been armed with hatchets and kidney-brossages, really inefficient and pathetic weapons, but Private Stapleton had discovered that the joints of each Engine-of-Devastation were soluble in a weak solution of acetic acid and an ammonia-copper sulfate mixture, making the process of dismantling the Engines-of-Devastation much easier, because the fusiliers could basically just cut the seams by streaming the solution down them. Shalgrussiadge's blue handlebar moustache glinted in the twilight as he took a swig of eight year old sloss-whisky: incapacitating the Kerveley Republic's war machine had taken way too long. Shalgrussiadge thought to himself "dammit, I'm a turnip farmer!" as the sloss-whisky burn coruscated in the back of his throat.

Ghusmoygne-Albrassago would probably be subject to prosecution by the Interconsortium: both the manufacture of the Engines-of-Destruction and the (mind-busting) sale to the Kerveley Republic are blatantly unethical, for the Engines-of-Destruction are very difficult to beat into ploughshares. Shalgrussiadge considered Aratulgo Consipher, the Kerveleyan field marshal who was probably responsible for their field deployment. What a bastard. Probably would get at least two centuries in the bismuth mines for this, if the Lenientists didn't get a hold of his case.